the worms the worms the worms.

[disenfranchised]

[ he wants it to stop. make it stop.
even long after his training is over, he's bending, writhing & twisting. trying to drown out noise that no one else can hear and dull sensations that no one else can feel. he wonders, if he had started younger would this have been easier? would his body have been more forgiving? everything inside of him is rebelling and rejecting one another, with pale, paperthin skin holding it all together. he's been drained of energy and stripped of color. once bright hair is now a tired, dark gray and once vibrant eyes have clouded considerably.

most of the time shinji wonders how he ever could have wanted this.
for the rest of it, he treats this as a stepping stone to achieving his inevitable greatness.
(not that he wasn't already great, of course.)

clumsily, he stumbles from the worm storage onto the dirty hallway floor.

get up.

c'mon, get up.

this wasn't a proper place for the head of the matou family.
slowly but surely he's back on his feet again, taking wobbling steps toward his bedroom. ]

Comments

[apriori]

[Oh, there you are.

He'd waited some time, leaning on the wall by Shinji's bedroom door. Really, it seems like every time, it takes Shinji just a little bit longer to make it out of that dark, miserable basement and back to his room. But that was okay. Shirou certainly didn't mind. After all, patience was a virtue, and one that was always rewarded when he gets to see Shinji tired and worn thin.]

You were gone for a while today.

[disenfranchised]

[ if time hadn't all but morphed into a blur, shinji likely would have been disappointed by it, too. he's not surprised to see shirou standing there, though. his only support through this venture, honestly. everyone else had given up on him and given up on the matou entirely, but shirou continued to stand by his side. it was quite lucky for the both of them. lucky for shinji because he needed the companionship more than ever, and lucky for shirou because once shinji mastered this magic, he planned to make everyone who had ever looked down on him pay dearly.

and wouldn't shirou want to be around to witness that.
groaning, he leans against the door frame. ]

I'm getting better -- [ his throat is dry.
he thinks he's getting better, at least. though it is quite a thing to get used to. while his magic is getting stronger, little by little, the physical repercussions are wearing him out completely. perhaps if he'd been blessed with a stature more like shirou's this wouldn't have to be a problem. ] It's a lot easier already.

[ he's been in the basement all day, though. with no real idea as to how long it's been. ] B-but I think I'm gonna go to bed...